ALEX thought John was perfect — until she realised he wanted her to change her body. Over a period of six weeks, I had a frequent customer: a tall lanky guy, with a thick crop of dark hair and the most startling bright blue eyes. I readily agreed. We went for a coffee, and the conversation flowed. John was 25 and studying for a degree in science at university.
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ON the corner of Seventh Avenue and Lincoln Place in Park Slope, Brooklyn, Ozzie's, a coffee bar, exists as a refueling point for teenagers attending Berkeley Carroll, the private school down the block, and for grown-ups on their way to Manhattan offices, thus making it an ideal laboratory each weekday morning to observe the signifiers of the modern generation gap. After near daily visits over the past few years, what this reporter has concluded is that teenage girls do not seem to share the adult woman's fear of starch. Nor, more significantly, do they appear to share her belief that a body betraying a love of such an enemy substance need be veiled like a public monument given over to Christo. Adhering to the dress code mandated by Britney Spears -- tight low-riding jeans, tighter truncated tank tops -- teenage girls unabashedly show their bellies even when they have actual bellies to show. What this stylistic phenomenon may represent is a significant shift in the way young women think about their bodies -- the first stage of a revolt against the assumption that no Pilates class can be missed in the pursuit of a figure resembling the neck of a giraffe. The evidence that an evolution is taking place in young women's attitudes is preliminary -- eating disorders do, after all, remain a serious health hazard -- but glimmers of a new mind-set are emerging from teenagers, from professionals who deal closely with them and even from images purveyed by the mass media. Andrea Marks, a co-author of the forthcoming book ''Healthy Teens, Body and Soul'' Fireside and a specialist in adolescent medicine who practices on the Upper East Side. Marks added, ''but girls are hearing more messages to take pride in normal body shapes. Torrid, a national chain of clothing stores that sells size 14 and above, has been built successfully from a realization by its founder, Betsy McLaughlin, that young women, no matter how they are proportioned, maintain an affinity for body-conscious styles.
Sex toys are for everyone
The F Word is a series celebrating what it means to be fat — from destigmatizing the word to taking stock of the discrimination fat people face. Whatever size you are — fat, skinny, or anywhere in between — you should feel comfortable and good about what you are doing, and that includes sex. Just you. To get more clear on what consent means and entails check out this cool graphic brought to you by Planned Parenthood.
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